


Valentine's Day

by WordsOfMyReality



Category: Orange is the New Black
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Humor, Lego Movie, Legos, Mall Food Court, Speed Dating, The Penguin - Freeform, catwoman - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-20 11:59:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17621987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WordsOfMyReality/pseuds/WordsOfMyReality
Summary: Desperate to not be alone on Valentine's Day, Piper resorts to attending a lesbian speed dating event. What will she do if she actually lands a date?





	1. First Date

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally written in 2017, and the movies referenced were new releases. I couldn't exactly re-write the fic now could I?

**FEBRUARY 11**

Piper threw her head dejectedly down on her arms, covering her closed laptop lid.

"You can't fool me Pip. How many years have we been friends? What are you hiding? Let me see that." Polly reached to pull the computer from beneath her friend's protective body.

A muffled "no" came from beneath the blonde's hair which fell over the laptop as she pulled the device tighter into her body as she turned to face the wall.

The brunette placed her hands on her pal's shoulders, turning her back in the correct direction before taking a seat. "Look, I know that ass dumped you right here before the most romantic day  **ever.** That's a sucky move. He never deserved you anyway. He's a prick your mother set you up with for her benefit, not yours."

Piper abruptly sat up. "Don't you think I know that? Larry is a dickhead, but who wants to spend Valentine's Day alone? Spending it with someone I loathe is slightly better than spending it by myself."

Polly took advantage of her friend's momentary lapse of attention and grabbed the laptop away from Piper's protective hold.

"What are you doing?" Piper's haphazardly attempted to get the device back or at least keep the brunette from seeing what she had been searching.

Polly lifted the lid and ran her eyes over the web page Piper had been reading. "Speed dating? Are you seriously looking into speed dating Piper?"

Piper's grin was sheepish. "A gal has to get a date for the most romantic day of the year somehow, doesn't she?"

"True. Let's see what we have here. V-day is in three days, so we are working on a short notice. You are going to have to find an event tonight or tomorrow if you want a date on that magical evening." Polly rubbed her hands together as she took over the search. "Just to show you the supportive friend that I am, let me take care of this. It's the least I can do for my grieving comrade."

Soon the pair had found several companies who were hosting speed dating events within their time frame. Polly picked up her cell phone and began dialing.

* * *

 

Half an hour later, Polly threw her phone down on the table. She leaned back in her chair, a disgusted look on her face. Piper came back in from the other room. "What's wrong?"

"Everybody is booked. I can't believe there are all these speed dating companies in town that I've never heard of and not even one has an opening for a woman. There is some bullshit about having to have an equal number of men and women."

Piper chuckled. "It only makes sense Polly."

"Well it's silly. Anyway, you are on the waiting lists of all companies that have a waiting list." Polly pushed the computer back some on the table.

Piper took a seat again and grabbed the computer to run another search. She pulled Polly's pad of paper over and did a second check against the list that her friend had written. "Hey, what about this one?" She pointed at one of the companies towards the end of the list. "Did you call them?"

Polly looked over her shoulder and laughed. "No. Read it more carefully chum."

Piper read it again. "And?"

"That company caters to women only."

"Well last time I checked, I am a woman."

Polly didn't know if her friend was serious or not. "Lesbians, Piper. Lesbians. This company is for lesbians."

"Well my track record with men sucks. I might as well try women! Besides you never know, I might just get a date for Valentine's Day out of it."

* * *

 

Polly finished trimming her nails and filing them into shape. Her fingers were soaking in a small bowl of warm water while she chattering to Piper about what she should talk about during her event. "You know Pip, in reality it doesn't matter what you say at these things. At these events, most people decide if they are interested within five seconds of sitting down."

Piper pulled her friend's hands out of the bowl and blotted off the moisture. "What you are telling me in reality is why bother talking? That it's the non-verbal communication at the beginning." She shook the nail polish bottle and started painting Polly's nails.

“I'm not saying that at all. I also read a study that discovered to increase your chance of getting a date, talk about travel."

"Why were you reading studies about speed dating?"

" _Cosmopolitan_ magazine." Both women laughed.

* * *

**.**

* * *

 

**FEBRUARY 12**

Piper had done her own internet research on the place the event was being held. While the location seemed casual and laid back, she felt she needed to dress a little more attractive than in a t-shirt and jeans. She had decided on a simple scoop neck shirt and a loose skirt that fell right above her knee. Piper felt this was casual enough to not stick out but enough to keep her comfortable in her own skin.

Piper showed up to the location of the speed dating event early as suggested by the woman who took her basic registration information over the phone the day before. She cautiously looked around her at the women standing in line around her, eyeing the variety of lesbians she saw. As she did, she became more confident knowing she was wearing what she normally would wear. This eased off some of her pre-event jitters.

As she made it to the front of the line, she was given a sticky name tag on which was her first name and a printed number. She also got a small stack of cards. Stopping at a folding table, she grabbed a red Solo cup and filled it with punch from the bowl and then found a seat at one of the small tables. Slowly the room filled up and women randomly took seats at the small tables positioned in two concentric large circles.

As she sipped on her drink, Piper went through different scenarios on how she should act. Polly had given her tips on what to talk about or questions to ask but the situation was still fairly high stress. Finally, she decided to just be herself. _What other way to see if someone is interested in dating her than to show her what you are really like? The real you! Wait. Was she really considering dating a woman? No. This was just for Valentine's Day. Right?_ Now Piper was right back to being nervous.

A relatively short bushy haired woman got up and tapped on a microphone a few times. "Hello, hello. Is this thing on?" Everyone laughed. She introduced herself and explained the rules of engagement for the event. The rounds would last for six minutes at which a small bell would be rang to signify the end of the round. The women on the inside circle would then rotate one position counter clockwise.

A one-minute grace period would be given for the transition and for women to make notes on their cards. Each woman would signify whether or not they would like to meet their "date" before the next round began. The day after the event, participants would receive word of their common matches and a method of contacting each other.

"Come on Vause. I'm short a girl. There's an odd number. Sit in for me. Please?" The bushy haired woman was pleading with a much taller woman. The taller of the two wore tight black jeans with a tattered band t-shirt. Her long black hair fell right below her shoulders and was pushed away from her face with a pair of black rimmed hot-secretary looking glasses.

"No Nichols. Your events are for schmucks. Losers."

"No Vause. I cater to lonely professionals who, in this case, probably don't want to spend Valentine's Day alone."

"Like I said, schmucks. No. And that's my final answer."

The lanky, pale skinned woman leaned against the doorway looking at the twenty some odd women who had gathered for the speed dating event. She rolled her eyes and was about to head to the bar to get a drink when one particular woman caught her attention. While simply dressed, the woman was stunning. She sat with such poise and grace and Alex couldn't tear her eyes away. Fuck. Now she wished she hadn't told Nicky no, but it was too late as she had found another fill-in and the event was underway. She kept her eyes on that woman the entire night as she made her way around the circle.

* * *

**.**

* * *

 

**FEBRUARY 13**

For some reason, Piper got up earlier than normal. Perhaps it was nerves from the anticipated results she would be receiving from the speed dating event the previous night. She avoided checking her e-mail to give the butterflies in her stomach a chance to settle. Rather she started brewing coffee and making a small breakfast out of a toasted bagel along with a smear of fruity cream cheese.

Retrieving her morning newspaper from the outside the front door, Piper settled for her morning routine. Soon her mind began to drift. She thought about the women she had briefly met and the cards on which she had checked her interest.

Her breath did a sharp intake as a realization hit her. "What if nobody liked me?" Piper slapped her own forehead. "What if I gave off 'straight girl' vibe?" Piper had a habit of speaking out loud when she talked to herself. "What if I can't even get a lesbian date? Oh my god. What  **is**  a lesbian date? What if I  **do**  get matches?"

Piper was now making herself frantic, a little sick to her stomach at this point. She decided to take a shower before checking her e-mail. The steam in her bathroom opened her pores while the hot water loosened up the tight muscles in her back.

Once Piper felt clean and suitably relaxed, she allowed herself to boot up her laptop and open her mail. She had two e-mails. Holding her breath, she opened one from the event organizer first. She quickly scanned it and let a relieved breath out. Of the dozen or so women in that circle, she believed she marked interest in about five. Selective, yes, but Piper reminded herself that she wasn't even gay.

There were four names and e-mails of matches which perked Piper's spirits up. She wasn't a complete loser after all, at least in the world of woman-attraction. She looked over the names, trying to put a face to each name as she tried to remember the conversation she had with each lesbian. She was fairly confident that she placed three of the women but the fourth, actually the first on the list, she had absolutely no clue.

Thinking nothing more of it, she returned to her e-mail the second e-mail was from avause@gmail.com .  _You were gorgeous last night. I couldn't keep my eyes off you. I'd love to see you tomorrow, or tonight even. Text me. Alex_ A number was included.

Piper realized that this was the name she didn't recognize from the event e-mail. Alex. Alex. Alex. Had she met an Alex? Piper prided herself in her incredible memory, and she certainly didn't recall an Alex.

Her phone alerted her to an incoming text message, breaking her thoughts about the mystery e-mail.

 _[I meant what I said. You are stunning. Can I convince you to go out with me? ~Alex]_  
_[How did you get this number?]_  
_[I have my ways, besides I gave you mine ;) ~A]_  
_[Still a little creepy]_  
_[The organizer is my best friend. I can get your address if you want creepy : ) ~A]_  
_[I'd rather just take you out ~A]_

Piper caught herself smiling at this insistent woman. She was humorous if nothing else.

 _[Well mysterious creepy Alex, I don't even know what you look like. How do I know I'm interested?]_  
_[Trust me. You won't be disappointed :)~ Just say yes ~A]_  
_[Ok Alex, I'll go out with on one condition]_  
_[Name it ~A]_  
_[I plan the date and what I say goes]_  
_[Oh a woman that takes charge, demanding. I like that ~A]_  
_[Deal?]_  
_[Deal! ~A]_

The pair communicated back and forth for a while. Piper told her she'd message later with where to meet the next day.

She hated to admit it, but Piper was actually uneasy. What had she been thinking when she went to a lesbian speed dating event? Even more so, what business did she have accepting a date with a woman she didn't even see at said event? Oh well, it was too late to back out.

* * *

**.**

* * *

 

**FEBRUARY 14**

Piper was extremely nervous as she sat in the mall food court. Her plans had started out as a joke as she tested the woman who boldly wouldn't take no for an answer. However, now she's wondering if now the joke was on her as she got a strong feeling she was about to be stood up. Piper scanned the area, watching the main entrances for a single woman who looked like she might be the one on which Piper was waiting.

A woman in a tailored gray suit slowly entered the area. She immediately caught Piper's attention. The woman could have adorned any billboard or magazine cover, but she was certainly better than those two-dimensional photo-shopped models. Somehow her imperfections made her perfect. Her suit was bold against her pale skin, but Piper could already envision her in jeans and a t-shirt, feet up on the couch and painting her nails. She was right there, only feet away, but in her understated allure, she might as well be on the television or a girl in a pop video. Piper knew this was Alex.

Piper gathered up her things to go. She knew she'd never see her again, but that was alright. Alex didn't need a plain gal like Piper, even for a simple Valentine's Day date planned at the last minute. In that moment Piper's eyes were down on her belongings. That's when the other woman spotted her. Before Piper could make her exit, the other woman was at her table.

The deep, raspy voice vibrated within her chest. "Piper?" Piper raised her eyes to look at the woman, mesmerized by her striking emerald eyes and jet-black hair. "I'm Alex." The gorgeous woman held her hand out to the blonde. Piper gently shook the proffered hand and was amazed at the woman's silky, soft skin.

"You are a woman of many words Piper. May I sit?" Piper nodded. "I must say you picked an interesting place to meet. Then again, they, whoever they are, say to meet someone for the first time in a public place. Anyway, I'm just glad that you agreed to meet."

Alex decided to let silence drift between the two to see if that would encourage the other woman to talk. She had been intrigued with the woman when she first laid eyes on her at Nicky's speed dating event. She had to work hard to get her information out of Nicky and now owed her friend a slew of favors. But it was worth it. She had been excited yesterday when Piper had agreed to go out with her on the condition that Piper got to plan the date. Alex readily agreed.

Eventually Piper broke the silence. "Ummm you are stunning."

Alex grinned sheepishly. "I’d say you are quite captivating yourself." She traced a short line across Piper's arm with her fingertip, stopping only when she felt the goosebumps on the blonde's arm. "The mall, eh. What are our plans?"

"I thought maybe we'd grab a bite to eat then maybe a movie." Piper looked at the woman before her trying to judge her reaction. She could not quite tell if Alex's enthusiasm was genuine.  _Oh well,_  Piper thought to herself,  _today is about me. My date. My plans._

"What are you in the mood for Piper? I passed a few restaurants on my way in. The lines didn't look  **too**  awfully long being that it's Valentine's Day and all."

Piper laughed. "Nope, let's eat up here." She motioned to all the cheap places around the food court mall. "Come on, be a kid again."

"Okay  _kid_. Do I at least get a say in the movie then?"

Piper pulled the tickets out of her pocket. "Already bought the tickets, so no." She glanced at her watch before speaking again. "And we have 40 minutes to eat, get to the theatre on the other side of the mall, get our snacks and get settled. Let's get going."

* * *

 

Neither woman could agree on what food to eat, so they decided they would get their own food and meet back at the table as quickly as possible. When Piper returned with her veggie wrap and sparkling water, Alex was waiting with a huge plate of Kung Pao Chicken, fried rice, and an egg roll. She also had a huge soda. When she saw Piper, Alex stopped playing with her chopsticks and slid an extra fortune cookie over to Piper.

"I brought dessert." Alex had decided that despite Piper being a bit on the strange side with her date planning, she would play along to see how far Piper would take it.

Piper smiled sheepishly. "It looks like you out ordered me."

Alex slid over an extra set of chopsticks. "Help yourself. So… Piper tell me about yourself."

The pair spent the next bit of time visiting back and forth exchanging meaningless tidbits of information such as favorite color, childhood pets, and best hang-out spots in the city. After they finished their meals and cleaned up the table, they headed towards the theatre.

"Do I get to know what we are seeing?" Alex was hoping for a sappy chick movie for Valentine's Day or even a horror flick so she could 'protect' the blonde.

"Ummm…" Piper was stalling. She hoped her earlier decision to test this woman's resilience would not backfire on her.

Alex gently shoulder checked the shorter woman as they walked. "Come on. I'm going to find out in a few minutes anyway."

"I don't want you to bail on me though." Piper chewed on the inside of her mouth, almost nervous that the raven-haired woman would do just that.

Alex's chuckle was as deep and raspy as her voice. "Hey ease up there kid. I ate mall food, didn't I?"

Piper pulled out one of the pair of tickets she held and gave it to Alex as they approached the theater.

"The LEGO Batman Movie?! Seriously?" Alex checked her voice.

Piper huffed. "Of course, it combines the best of both worlds – I happen to love Batman  **and**  playing with Legos." She tried to keep a straight face as long as possible before bursting out in laughter. "Come on, I've already bought the tickets. Let's give it a shot."

After showing the usher their tickets, they got in line for refreshments. Alex insisted on paying for the popcorn and sodas since Piper had bought the tickets. Once they made their way to the correct theatre, they discovered that the previews had yet to come on and the room was practically empty. They found great seats halfway up right in the middle.

* * *

 

Alex and Piper exited the theatre laughing up a storm. "I have to admit Piper, that was one of the better movies I have seen in a while. Thanks." Unconsciously she slipped her hand into Piper's as they walked. Piper flinched slightly but didn't pull her hand from Alex's grasp which gave Alex a warm and fuzzy feeling in her chest.

"I have to say Alex, I'm moved. I made these plans to make sure this would be our only date. I mean who in their right mind would eat at a mall food court and then go see a cartoon movie with a complete stranger. That's not very impressive."

"What can I say, you have an effect on me." Alex knew she was pressing her luck when she brought Piper's hand to her lips and gently kissed her knuckles. "I've really enjoyed today, your company. I know you said you were recently dumped, but I hope you would consider seeing me again." Alex looked over at Piper.

Piper's look was incredulous. "Did you miss the part about me being straight?"

"As a friend," Alex added.

Suddenly Piper dropped Alex's hand as she squealed. "Oh my gosh Alex, look the Lego store! Can we go in? Please?"

* * *

 

The pair decided on two smaller pieces from the movie. Piper chose _'The Penguin Artic Roller'_. Alex argued that the Penguin was a bad guy and Piper shouldn't support evil. But Piper countered that penguins were awesome animals. Alex selected ' _Catwoman Catcycle Chase_ '. When Piper pointed out that Catwoman, too, was a bad guy, Alex responded, "Yeah, but she's hot."

Alex narrowed her eyes in thought. "Hey Pipes, wait here, okay? I'll be right back." She ran back into the store.

The casual nickname caught Piper off guard, and she nodded in agreement without even questioning Alex. Soon Alex exited the store with another purchase, this time a large box that had been wrapped in brown paper.

Piper hopped up and down. "What did you get? What did you get?" Her excitement was unmistakable.

"I'm not telling. That's why it's wrapped." Alex laughed when Piper stuck out her lower lip in a fake pout. "That won't work on me Pipes. Patience is a virtue."

"I meant what I said earlier Pipes. You are great. The guy, what's his name – Harry, Barry, whatever – who dumped you last week. Screw him. You are better off without him."

Piper had only planned the food court and the movie. She thought that would be enough to ensure she wouldn't have to stay out with Alex the entire day. But the longer they spent together, the more she realized she was enjoying the woman's company. Their conversation was easy and not forced. Alex was certainly nothing like any of the guys she had ever dated, especially Larry. With Alex, it was so easy which was truly rare, especially for a first outing.

* * *

 

Soon the woman had made their way back to the food court. "I don't want today to end. I planned the most horrible adult date ever in hopes it would be short, but now – I don't want it to be." Piper's voice was sad and mopey.

Alex raised one eyebrow. "It doesn't have to be you know. I can think of ways to entertain you." Piper slapped her chest playfully. "Not like that Pipes. I don't want today to be over either. Look if you trust me, we can go back to my place. I can cook dinner, or we can order take-out." She slapped the wrapped package she had bought earlier. "And maybe you can find out what's in here."

Piper's eyes lit up, becoming even brighter blue with her emotions. "We can do that. I need to change clothes, so how about I meet you at your place in an hour?"

"Whenever. I'll be there." Alex texted Piper her address and rushed home to make sure her place wasn't too much of a mess before the blonde beauty arrived.

* * *

 

Polly met Piper as she walked in the door. "Well? Did the plans run her off quickly enough? I expected you back earlier." Piper's sheepish look caused Polly to gasp. "Piper, what are you doing?"

Piper had quickly shed what she had worn to the mall in exchange for some more comfortable clothing. She pulled on a pair of ripped, faded skinny jeans and a cute top. "Ummmm I'm going to her place."

"You're what? No Pip. That wasn't the plan. You wanted a date for Valentine's Day. You went on one. Now you are done. You are not going to a stranger's place."

Piper felt her phone buzz. She looked at the screen.

[Bring the Penguin. Catwoman is feeling feisty ~A]

Alex's message made Piper laugh. "She's not a stranger." Piper yanked open the wine fridge and began searching for a bottle that was neutral yet impressive. "You look nice. Enjoy your night with Pete. Don't wait up." And as quickly as she arrived, she left.

Piper sent a text as soon as she got in the Uber.

 _[ETA 15 min. Bringing wine ~ P]_  
_[Can't wait ~A]_

* * *

Piper knocked on the door of the address Alex had texted her. Enough time passed that Piper became nervous she was at the wrong place. As she was about to walk away, the door was flung open, and the wild haired woman from the speed dating event was thrust out. Alex stood behind her laughing. "Sorry about that Pipes. Nichols was just leaving. Come in." Alex pulled Piper in and pushed Nicky out before her friend could even speak.

Alex took the bottle of wine from Piper and set it on her counter. "Make yourself at home."

Piper walked around the living room, examining the rows and rows of books on the built-in bookshelves. There were also travel mementos from many countries as well as stack of vinyls. A record player was on a stand next to the window. "What's the plan?"

"Well I thought we could order in. Cooking would take too long. Name your poison." Alex thrust some paper delivery menus in Piper's direction. After a bit of perusing the menus, Piper selected a Thai place and told Alex to choose for her.

After Alex phoned in the order, Piper said, "so what are  **your**  plans for tonight? I hope they are better than Batman and Legos."

"Actually… "Alex threw her head back and laughed. "I hope you aren't disappointed." She motioned to the kitchen table where the wrapped package from the mall sat. "Open it."

Piper clapped as she giggled. "Yay! Presents!" She made short work of the brown paper wrapping and her giggle turned into a shriek. "Oh my god Alex. You got the _Batcave Break-In_ set! This is going to be so much fun!" She pulled the Penguin Roller out of her purse and tossed the package on the table. Alex already had Catwoman waiting on the table.

"Oh, and this." Alex handed Piper one more thing.

"BATMAN MINI-FIGURES." Piper threw her arms around Alex's neck. "I could just kiss you." Alex froze. Piper laughed at the look on Alex's face. "I was serious when I told you I like Legos."

* * *

The pair worked late into the evening assembling and playing with the things they had bought. Thai food containers were strewn about the kitchen along with several empty wine bottles. Then women ended up sitting side by side on the couch with their feet put up on the coffee table.

"Alex?"

"Hmmm?"

"I enjoyed today. A lot."

"Me, too."

The silence between them seemed comfortable, right.

"I probably need to head home Al. It's getting late."

"Hmmm okay."

Alex hopped off the couch and pulled Piper to her feet and walked her to the door. They stood right outside the door staring at each other. Piper moved forward and wrapped her arms around Alex. After a few moments embracing the taller woman in a hug, Piper backed off.

"Happy Valentine's Day Alex."

"Happy Valentine's Day Piper."

With a quick wave, Piper turned and left.

Piper ordered an Uber and was soon on her way home. Piper's day-dreaming was cut short by the sound of her text message tones sounding. Her ride was almost at her doorstop.

 _[Alex: I hear there is a good rom-com coming out this weekend]_  
_[Piper: Yeah?]_  
_[Alex: Would you be interested in going with me?]_

Piper's grin was plastered across her face as she responded.

 _[Piper: Hell yeah I'm interested!]_  
_[Alex: Awesome. Thanks again for a great Valentine's Day!]_  
_[Alex: Maybe next time I'll get a kiss]_  
_[Piper: LOL Don't press your luck]_  
_[Piper: Good night Al]_  
_[Alex: Sweet dreams Pipes]_


	2. Second Date

**FEBRUARY 15**

Piper held her coffee cup in both hands to warm them as she stared at the corner of the framed picture on the wall. She was startled out of her glaze when Polly spoke a little too loudly. "Hello, Piper. Are you in there?" Piper took a sip of the piping hot brown liquid and turned her head towards her friend. "Ahh, you do respond after all. How was your night?"

Piper smiled and reached over to pull off a piece of pastry she had warmed up in the toaster. "Hmmm, okay. So … what Piper? Spill the beans." Polly poured her own coffee and pulled up a chair. She grabbed Piper's chair and turned it to face her. "Speak."

"I had a great time Polly. Even more than I realized I would."

"Okay, this is like pulling teeth.” Polly rolled her eyes. “Tell me, I want specifics."

"There's not much to tell Pol. I promise."

"There has to be something. I haven't seen you smile like this in lord knows how long."

"Just a night of wine, Thai food, and Batman Legos."

Polly rolled her eyes and growled. "Oh Piper, you are incorrigible. When you are ready to talk, come find me." She chuckled as she got up and took her coffee to her room.

* * *

 

Piper fiddled with her phone, turning it end over end between her thumb and forefinger. When it buzzed and the screen lit up, she was startled. Thumbing the lock screen open, she smiled even larger as she saw the text.

[Alex: Good morning Pipes]

Piper tried to decide how quickly she should message back to not seem too eager. But she couldn’t hold out long.

[Piper: Morning yourself]  
[Alex: Sleep well?]  
[Piper: Went to sleep and woke up with a smile on my face]  
[Alex: Oh, do tell, do tell!]  
[Piper: A woman never shares her secrets]  
[Alex: Hmmm Okay. How are Batman and Harley Quinn?]  
[Piper: I'm not sure; how are they?]  
[Alex: Ahhh, I see… the woman doesn't empty her pockets. Check your overcoat]

Piper tossed her phone on the table and reached her hands into the pockets of her overcoat which was hanging on a hook near the door. Her fingers jammed into small plastic figures. Once she pulled them out, she laughed.

[Piper: Nurse Harley Quinn and Lobster-Lovin' Batman. When did you sneak those in? More importantly why?  
[Alex: I figured you needed body guards to make sure you got home okay]  
[Piper: How sweet. Silly but sweet]  
[Alex: I just wanted to say good morning. I have work today, but may I message you later?]  
[Piper: I'm glad that you did and I hope that you do]  
[Alex: Ciao]

Piper grinned at the message thread and then went to get ready for her day.

Throughout the day, Piper would check her phone to find little messages from Alex. Each time, her face would break out into a huge grin. Conversely when she checked her phone and she didn't have a message, she was a bit sad. Silly as it may be, it kept her mind occupied during an otherwise boring day.

* * *

**FEBRUARY 17**

Piper could not determine what woke her up until she realized her phone was ringing. After frantically digging through her bed covers, she located her phone and brought it to her ear. Her voice was groggy and full of sleep as she answered the phone without checking the caller ID. "'Lo?"

"Good morning." The husky voice was deep and resonated in Piper's chest sending chills through her body. After a pause, the woman spoke again. "Normally this is when you reply. Perhaps something along the lines of 'good morning'."

Shaking her head trying to clear the sleep fog, Piper tried to place the voice. She then looked at the face of the phone, the caller ID and realized the caller was Alex. "Well good morning. What a surprise to hear your voice Alex."

"I decided to give your fingers a break." Alex chuckled at her own personal joke. "It sounds as though I woke you. Shall I let you go?"

"No, no, it's okay. Please don't hang up. I just was sleeping in today." Piper sat up and scooted back to lean against her headboard. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this wake-up call." Piper wondered if her smiles were evident through her voice. The past two days of constant texting with the black-haired beauty was becoming quite the positive habit.

"Well I decided to change things up a bit, I guess. Plus, I haven't heard your voice since Valentine's Day. Maybe I just missed it."

"Is that so?"

"Hmm mmm. Something wrong with that?"

"Not in the least." Piper paused. "So… is there a particular reason you called, other than missing my voice?"

"Yes Piper, there is. It's Thursday. That rom-com I asked you about opens tomorrow. Are you still up to going with me?"

Piper hummed as she considered her response. "Hmmmm, I suppose I can spend some more time in your presence." She laughed as she heard Alex's deep laugh on the other end of the phone.

"Well you got to plan Valentine's Day, so how about I give this one a try?"

"I could be convinced of that. Is there anything I need to do?"

"Absolutely not; this one is on me." Alex chuckled as the plans she had already made drifted through her mind. "I'm glad you trust me."

* * *

Piper spent the rest of the day with a smile plastered on her face. Try as she might, she could not imagine what Alex had planned for them the following evening. She was still amazed that Alex hadn't been bothered by the Valentine's Day lunch in the mall food court and the animated movie. Thinking about the night with Thai food while constructing the Lego set gave her a warm fuzzy feeling because most guys she had dated would have hated that on a regular day and absolutely abhorred it on the holiday made for romance and love.

Especially Larry. He had always been trying to impress Piper with his money and obsession for all things opulent. Luckily enough time had passed that Piper was now aware of just how lucky she was that he dumped her.

* * *

 

Alex and Nicky were sharing the dining table with the Batcave Break-In set. Care had been taken to not dislodge any pieces or to disturb it in any fashion.

"How long is this going to be here Stretch?" Nicky held up a finger as if to push the structure aside.

Alex quickly slapped her friend's hand away. "That's none of your concern." Alex pushed her black rimmed glasses atop her head, pulling her equally black hair away from her face. She studied a yellow legal pad of paper. "Help me double check this list Nichols. Tomorrow has to be perfect."

Together they went through the list, verifying what had been taken care and what needed to be done the following day. Things were falling into place.

* * *

**FEBRUARY 18**

While she was slightly sad that she had not heard from Alex a lot today, Piper managed to be excited and equally as nervous about their second date. Not having a clue what Alex had in store for her heightened her sense of curiosity. She did know that dinner was at 6:00. But that's all she knew.

It was 5:40 pm and she was still waiting for the text with the address of where to go. Hearing the doorbell ring, she glanced at her phone thinking she missed the message that Alex was picking her up. When she saw nothing, she went to door and opened it to find a tall, handsome man dressed in a driver's uniform standing holding an envelope.

"Ms. Chapman, I presume?" When Piper nodded yes, he handed her the thick envelope.

She slid her forefinger along the edge, breaking the seal and withdrew the folded stationery inside.  _Ms. Piper Chapman. I invite you to join me for an evening of food, drinks, and a movie. Please allow Mark to chauffer you to the dining establishment._  Piper smiled as she reread the note. Alex's block hand-writing was simple yet charming. She laid the envelope on the table beside the door and offered her arm to Mark. "I guess I'm to go with you Mark."

He nodded his head and escorted Piper to the waiting car, opening her door and assuring she was tucked safely inside before closing the door and climbing into the driver's seat. Piper tried to get him to talk on the ride to their destination, but he was silent for the most part. The only thing he said was, "Trust me ma'am. You are going to have quite a night." Piper could see the smile on his face reflected by the eye twinkle in the rear-view mirror.

* * *

 

Alex nervously fiddled with the hem of her pants as she tried to keep from downing the drink in front of her. While the whiskey would calm her nerves somewhat, it wouldn't do for her to be intoxicated when Piper arrived. A glance at her watch told her that Piper should be arriving at any moment.

No sooner did those thoughts go through her mind did she see the driver she had hired to escort her date walk in with Piper on his arm. She pushed down the slight bit of jealousy she felt until the blonde beamed a stunning smile her direction. Alex rose and walked towards the pair. "Mark, thank you for picking her up. I appreciate it. That will be all."

Piper held her arms in front of her, hands clasped in front of her trying not to gawk at Alex. She was even more elegant than Piper had remembered, her movements graceful and smooth. Alex approached her, placing a hand on each shoulder and lightly kissed her cheek. Piper found herself moving into Alex's body to give her a quick hug. The movement was unexpected to them both but certainly welcomed.

"Have a seat," Alex murmured as she motioned to the table set for two, beautifully adorned with a lovely centerpiece of fresh flowers and candles. Piper's heart fluttered when Alex pulled the chair out for her to help her get seated.

Looking around, Piper took in the sights of the quaint, small dining area. "This place is lovely Alex, definitely quieter than the mall food court." Both women laughed.

"Lots quieter, particularly tonight since we have the place to ourselves." Alex raised a hand and motioned to an unseen server who quickly appeared table side with a bottle of wine. "I took the liberty of selecting the wine." The server poured a small bit into a glass. Alex swirled it around a bit, took a whiff of its aroma, and sampled the taste. When she was satisfied, she nodded towards the server who filled both women's glasses.

Piper lifted her glass to Alex in a toast. "Here's to good wine and better company." After taking a sip, Piper settled back in her chair, legs crossed at the ankles. "I'm impressed Alex. How did you manage to score the entire restaurant?"

Alex laughed quietly. "Let's just say I know people. Tell me how the rest of your week has gone?"

The two spent the next few glasses of wine talking about mundane things such as work and home life. Piper was surprised at how comfortable she felt around Alex. The feelings were reminiscent of the evening spent with the Legos. Legos. Oh! She turned to her purse and briefly rummaged around, pulling out the two Batman-mini's Alex had left in her overcoat pocket.

Alex couldn't contain her mirth when Piper placed them on the table. "Well I guess dinner isn't complete without Batman and Harley Quinn."

Before Piper went to answer, a loud gurgle erupted from her stomach. "Oh my!" She placed her hand over her mid-section. "How embarrassing. Pardon me."

"My apologies. I should have assumed you would come hungry. How about we order?" Alex reached under her plate and handed a small, rectangular menu to the woman sitting next to her. "If you don't see anything that suits you, we can order off the regular menu."

"No, no. This looks amazing."

Once Piper had made her selection, Alex again lifted a finger towards the darkened corner and the server appeared again. Piper gave her order. When the server turned to Alex, she simply said, "Tell Red the usual." The server nodded and turned in what was probably the direction of the kitchen.

"Oh, so you know the chef. Is that your connection here?"

Alex laughed a little harder this time. "Oh, Red? She's not just the chef. She's the owner. We go way back. I guess you could say she's my proverbial mom. We met upstate and spent some time together. Now that she has this place, I frequent it as often as possible. We do each other favors on occasion."

"Wow, you must have had to pull a lot of favors to get her to close her place on a Friday night."

Alex grinned. "Let's just say I'm charming like that."

* * *

 

The conversation between the two was non-stop while they waited for their food. Talk was briefly interrupted as the chef, a woman with bright red short hair, brought the food to their table. As she placed Piper's in front of her, Piper addressed the woman. "You must be Red. Alex speaks highly of you."

The chef spoke in a thickly accented voice, "In Russia, we call that 'bullshit'." She turned and left the table without saying another word.

"Thanks Red." Alex called after her. "She's not always that gruff. She's just pissed I called in the big favor."

"She's not going to hurt us, is she? She looks a little mean." Piper's voice showed a hint of fear and concern.

Alex laughed as she responded. "Not Red. At least not to me. Remember, I'm her daughter."

The verbal exchange between the two slowed while the woman ate. Finally, Piper found herself stuffed. She tossed her napkin beside plate and pushed back from the table. "That was the best meal I've had in quite some time. Definite compliments to the chef Alex. Please pass along my gratitude."

Alex dabbed her mouth. "I'll be sure to tell her. She'll appreciate your praise. I hope you saved room for movie junk food! I can't watch a movie without it." This made Piper laugh. In fact, about everything about Alex made Piper laugh. She was enjoying the warm feeling that hadn't left her soul since Valentine's Day.

* * *

 

Piper stood up and began to put on her coat so the pair could go to the movie. Alex gently took the coat from her saying, "You won't need that Pipes. We aren't going far." Piper's face had a curious look as she simply shrugged and decided to go along with it. Alex was just full of surprises tonight.

The two women linked hands and walked towards the back of the restaurant. They climbed a staircase which was earlier hidden from the view of the dining area. Alex opened one side of a double door and they walked into a medium sized room with tables staggering down towards a large screen at the front.

"What is this?"

"Why Piper, it's a movie theatre. Red has a private screening area which she typically leases out to small independent productions for movie screenings. Let's just say she's well connected."

"This is getting more interesting by the minute. Are we seeing an indie film?" Piper wasn't quite sure she liked the sound of that, but she trusted Alex and was enjoying spending the time with her. She was certainly willing to sit through an unknown movie for that time to continue.

"Piper, as I told you on V-Day, a new Rom-Com released today. I thought you might like to watch that without the crush of teenagers at a commercial theater."

The blonde stood on her tip-toes and kissed Alex on the cheek. "It seems as though you are pretty well connected as well. What's the movie?"

" _Everybody Loves Somebody_. It's about a female doctor who asks one of her colleagues to pretend to be her boyfriend at a weekend family function. It got decent reviews. So – pick your seat. The place looks to be wide open."

As soon as the lights darkened as the preview reels started, the restaurant server came in with a tray of drinks and snacks including freshly popped buttery popcorn. "Damn you Alex. You know I'm stuffed."

"Yeah, but who can resist popcorn?" Alex grinned as she grabbed a handful, tossed it into the air and tried to catch it in her mouth.

* * *

 

Alex had her arm draped over Piper's shoulder as they walked in the park after the movie. "Tell me Piper. If I asked you to pose as my girlfriend at a family wedding, would you?"

Piper tensed up before she realized that Alex was only joking. "Of course I would. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't? Especially after this unbelievable evening you planned." She laughed as she pressed herself into Alex's warmth.

"Enjoy yourself?"

"Without a doubt. I'm certain you already know that." She could feel Alex smile against the top of her head.

"Does that mean you will go out with me again?" It was Alex who now held her breath as she pressed her luck with this question.

Piper stopped, turned, and grasped both Alex's hands. "Tell me Alex, what are your expectations here?"

"I don't have any Pipes. Is it wrong to enjoy your company without an ulterior motive?"

Piper stared into Alex's eyes and saw nothing but sincerity. She turned back, pulled Alex's arm over her shoulder and continued to walk.

Eventually they were at Piper's place. "Well this is me. I suppose this is where we part." Piper let go of Alex and lifted the latch to the front gate of her place, hesitating. Did she really want the night to end? Polly was out with Pete and had hinted that she wouldn't be home that night.

"Thanks for going out with me tonight Pipes. I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." Alex leaned over and kissed Piper on the corner of her lips and pulled her into a friendly embrace. As she released Piper, she turned to go. Piper held on to her hands.

"Ummmm Alex?" Alex turned back to her and raised an eyebrow. "Would you like to come up for a drink?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again... this was originally written in 2017, and the movies referenced were new releases. I chose to not re-write it.


	3. The Mug

Piper unpacked the last of the boxes, carefully arranging the creations around what was now considered the "Lego Room". Chuckling, she looked around at the various creations she and Alex had pieced together over the last six months. She was always drawn to the Batcave Break-In model which they had built on their first date. Who would have thought an outing to a mall and a kids' movie would lead to this?

She smiled as she rearranged the mini-figures so that Catwoman was slightly in front of the others. Catwoman was Alex's favorite and frankly reminded Piper of Alex so was also her favorite by default. But she would never tell Alex that. Alex's ego did not need any more massaging as it was large enough already.

Piper's second favorite was the Fairground Mixer. Alex had surprised her with this kit seemingly randomly until they finished and then they took a trip to the county fair the next weekend. Piper had laughed so hard on the Tilt-A-Whirl. Alex had snickered more at Piper being dizzy as she stumbled off the ride. It was a fun-filled day of sugary snacks and fried foods. The couple were always having fun and much of that was to do with Alex's creative imagination.

Piper made quick work of the remaining boxes and shoved the collapsed cardboard down the incinerator slot at their apartment. Their apartment. Piper sighed. Six months and "they" had their own apartment.  _That's not moving too quickly is it?_  She had been second guessing the decision since the moment she had agreed to find a place more suitable for two people rather than alternating in each of their tiny places. Alex did have a point when she pointed out that they would save money as well as be much more comfortable. Of course, Alex could convince a leopard to give up his spots.

They had leased a three bedroom so that they would still have a guest bedroom after converting one to a dual home office. Periodically one or both women would need to work from home, and this apartment accommodated that well. Today was one of those work-from-home days for Piper.

She settled down at her desk and propped her iPad up on its stand and called Polly on FaceTime. "Hey Pol. How's my bestie?" Polly screwed up her face and pressed it against the camera and grunted. "You are so fucking weird. Why do I love you?"

"Because I'm your best pal Piper. And don't you forget it! How is the love shack shaping up? All settled in?" Polly knew Piper hated when she teased her about moving in with Alex. Piper normally wasn't one to move so quickly. "Turned in the U-Haul yet?"

"Shut the fuck up Polly. I hate you."

"No you don't. Hey, are you going to the Natural & Organic Cosmetics Conference this year? I think we could learn a lot for Popi. It's in Berlin."

Piper picked up a nail file and began working on her nails. "I think so. I thought about asking Alex to join me. We haven't been on vacation together yet. Do you think we'd rip each other's throats out?"

"You should have thought about that before moving in with her." Polly snorted. "Go ahead and ask. Berlin has a lot of culture and art as well. Right up her alley." Polly chortled again. "Oh wait, I meant beer gardens."

"You are so mean to her Polly. Leave it alone. I'm happy and you know it. And just for that, I'm asking her tonight." Piper reached over and disconnected the video chat. "And I call that woman my friend."

* * *

Alex popped the cork on a bottle of wine she had brought home to celebrate their first night in the new place. "Dinner smells wonderful Pipes." Alex wrapped her arms around Piper from behind and held a glass of wine for her to take.

Piper craned her head around to kiss her girlfriend. "I just hope it tastes as good as it smells."

Alex returned the kiss then went to set the table and to bring the sides to the table. Soon both were comfortably seated and enjoying their first meal as a completely domesticated couple. Piper lay her fork on the edge of her plate and looked fondly at Alex.

She was nervous at how Alex would react but decided to just go for it. Retrieving an envelope from the bar, she slid it in front of Alex nodded towards it for her to open it. Alex dabbed her mouth with her napkin and slid the papers out of the envelope.

"The  _International Literature Festival…_ Ummmm Piper, as incredible as this would be, it's in Berlin! I don't even have a current passport.  _Berlin Art Week…_  that's definitely in Berlin." Alex's confusion showed in her voice. "What is this?"

Piper explained about the conference she had decided to go to for her and Polly's business. "I thought maybe you'd like to go with me… our first vacation together. Besides, if we have plane tickets, we can get your passport in one day. So…." Piper had a hopeful look on her face. "… do you want to go?"

* * *

"Eisbein?" Alex looked questioningly at Pioer. "What the hell did you just order?"

"Well we  **are**  at Zur Letzten Instanz, Berlin's oldest restaurant dating back to the 1600's. They are known for their pig knuckle." Alex screwed up her face at that pronouncement knowing she had no choice in the matter. Piper and Alex had decided to share all their dishes while in Berlin. This allowed them to back away if they found something they did not feel quite ambitious about. As well, they could eat at twice as many places.

While they waited for their huge chunk of primal meat, the couple visited about their respective days. For the first week, each attended their perspective conferences. Today was the last day of that schedule and they would spend the remaining time together sightseeing around the rest of the city.

They had used a cool app, Sygic Travel, to plan what they wanted to see to make the most of their vacation days. Much of their time was spent visiting sites focusing on World War II and the Holocaust along with the Berlin Wall, of course.

One day, they took a day trip out to Sachsenhausen-Oranienburg, the closest concentration camp to the area. On the return trip, everyone on the tour was dead silent. There was none of the chatter as there had been on the trip up. Piper laid her head on Alex's shoulder, yet neither of them uttered a word – not until they were safely back into their hotel room.

Alex collapsed on the bed, and Piper flopped herself on top of her. Piper buried her face into Alex's hair and kissed her neck. "Babe, today was intense. I knew it would be, but nothing would have ever prepared me for the somberness of the camp."

Dipping her head down to find Piper's mouth, Alex sought comfort in her lover's lips. "That place definitely causes one to reflect on life and the fortune of when and where one was born."

Piper rolled over to lay next to Alex and entwined her leg with the taller woman's. "How about we do something lighter tomorrow?"

Propping herself up on one elbow, she wrapped her fingers in Piper's hair. "What were you thinking?" She pressed a kiss against Piper's forehead.

Piper grinned as she thought. "How about the zoo? And before you say that we can go to zoos in the states… the Berlin Zoo has the most species of any zoo in the world."

"Seriously?" Alex looked up at the ceiling. "We are in Germany and my girlfriend wants to go to the zoo. Geesh." She could feel the breath go out of Piper's chest in disappointment. This time she rolled on top of Piper and smothered her in kisses. "Of course we can go to the zoo Pipes."

* * *

Piper excitedly pressed her palms against the glass of the chilled enclosure. As Alex placed her hands on Piper's shoulders, she could feel Piper vibrating with enthusiasm. Alex stepped back and pulled out her camera hoping to capture the look on Piper's face with the penguins in the background. The cute little tuxedo wearers practicing their diving as they dipped in and out of the water.

Soon keepers wearing knee-high boots carrying clipboards and buckets entered the enclosure. The sounds of the king penguins came through the glass. Their little "squee", "squee", "squees" had Piper's exhilaration ramped up.

"Alex, Alex, I think it's feeding time!" Piper was glowing as she watched the keepers drop fish into each penguin's mouth and making a note of their tag number on the clipboard to ensure each bird got a sufficient meal. Alex was clicking photos as quickly as possible. This, was priceless. She could not be more in love with Piper Chapman. From the first time Alex laid eyes on the blonde at the speed dating event right before Valentine's Day, she knew it was the beginning of something special.

Once the feeding was over, Piper was on cloud nine. She insisted on taking a short break as the adrenaline leaving her body left her drained. Once her energy was charged, they continued the tour of the animals.

The woman made the most of their visit, staying until the zoo closed. Alex ducked into a gift store right before it closed. As she exited, her purchase was not hidden at all. Piper grinned from ear-to-ear as she plucked the two-foot tall stuffed penguin from Alex's backpack. She wrapped her arms around the black and white bird and buried her face in its furry tufts.

"I love it Alex. I do! And I love you." She tucked her arm into Alex's, and they wandered out of the zoo.

* * *

"Today has been wonderful Alex. I could not have asked for a better zoo visit. I'm exhausted. There's a Starbucks right by the exit. Can we get some coffee or something? I could use a caffeine boost." Alex rolled her eyes as she shook her head. She bumped Piper with her shoulder as they made their way the short distance to the Starbucks.

Piper found a pair of chairs at one of the high-top tables outside while Alex retrieved the orders from inside. "Isn't she gorgeous?" Piper pointed to Alex inside with the stuffed animal's flipper. Piper was having an animated conversation with the stuffed penguin. She was so utterly happy at this point in life. She had a wonderful job, an incredible girlfriend and an outlook on life that could not be beat. "I love her little birdy. Yes, I do!"

Alex came behind Piper and set her drink down. "What on earth are you doing? Talking to your penguin?"

"Yup!" Piper beamed as she carefully sipped her steaming drink. They sat at the table in silence enjoying their drinks as they watched people travel up and down the street and the busses as they made their trek dropping off and picking up passengers. It was the perfect way to wind down while amping up with caffeine.

Piper shook Alex's cup to check to see if she was done. Gathering both cups, she went to toss the garbage in the trash. Something caught Piper's eye in the window. When she did not return immediately, Alex turned and saw that Piper was squatting looking at large mugs in the windows of the Starbucks. Alex went to see what she was starting at.

"What's up Pipes?"

"Look at this mug." She motioned towards a black and white mug done in relief with figures of the Brandenburg Gate and Fernsehturn Spire along with other notable places. The word Berlin was printed on the interior lip of the mug. "That's an awesome coffee cup. It represents most of our first vacation Alex." She looked up at Alex. "What do you think?"

"I think you are right, as usual."

Piper went into Starbucks and examined several mugs until she found the perfect specimen. She had it tightly wrapped in several layers of protective paper to ensure it would make the journey back to the states.

* * *

Piper gently slid her backpack under the seat in front of her. She and Alex had bought several keepsakes, but the breakable ones were safely tucked away in her bag so she could carry them onto the plane and not risk them in her checked luggage.

Once they got back to their home, Piper found places for each and every magnet and knickknack they had purchased. She was proud that the apartment was become quite a home that represented them as a couple rather than two individuals.

A few days later, Piper decided she wanted some hot tea. As the water heated up, she opened the cabinet and was searching for a mug to use. She found the Berlin coffee mug on one of the higher shelves. Now Piper was one who believed that usable souvenirs should be used and decided that was the one she wanted to use in honor of hers and Alex's first vacation.

Piper chose a sweet peppermint tea and dropped the bag into the mug and poured the boiling water into the black and white mug. Once the tea had time to steep and the water time to cool, she closed her eyes and took a sip of the refreshing tea. Then she stopped, as if she was frozen in time.

Alex walked into the kitchen and saw Piper sitting at the table, staring at the mug – not moving or drinking its contents. As she approached the blonde, Alex realized she was crying. Concerned, she quickly closed the distance between herself and Piper.

"Hon, what is wrong? Piper, talk to me." Piper snuffled as she wiped the tears from her face. She pointed at the mug. Confused, Alex picked it up and examined it. "What babe? Tell me."

"It's cracked. I cracked it with the hot water from the tea." Piper leaned into Alex's body.

Alex took the mug to the sink and dumped out the tea so she could examine it closer. "Piper, the mug isn't cracked. This is just a hairline fissure that doesn't affect its usability at all. Sweetie, it's okay. Let me just make you some more tea." Alex put the tea pot back on the stove.

"No! Not with this mug. I ruined it. Please Alex. I don't want to break it further. It's special."

"Pipes I promise it's okay to use. Trust me."

With this, Piper started to cry again which was breaking Alex's heart. She gently rinsed the cracked mug and placed it on the drainer to dry. She made a note to find a place to keep the Berlin mug safe. She retrieved another mug from the cabinet and made Piper another cup of tea in a different mug.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you you have read some of my other stories, you may recall the recurring theme of the white mug with a hairline crack. This is the story of that damned mug! ha ha


End file.
